TBT – Fable: A Tale of Choices and Chickens
Chicken Chaser? D’you chase chickens?
Yes, now sod off you annoying little tit.
Fable was originally released for the Xbox and PC in 2004 and re-released with new content in 2005, and then re re-released as the Anniversary edition in 2014 with better graphics, a better save system and the all important achievements (of which I have painstakingly gotten every single one and if you don’t believe me you can check my Steam), but all the same bugs.
Fable was toted as “the best game ever” filled with ridiculous features like trees that grow in real time and less ridiculous ones like being able to have children, neither of which happened (except the children one, which is possible in Fable 2 and 3.) Despite not living up to a lot of its promises, Fable was well received by critics.
And also by a 13 year old me, who hadn’t heard about any of those fancy features (except children, I think) and also probably didn’t care. I don’t even remember how I found out about the game but it was probably the same way I did Prince of Persia: Sands of Time, which was through some video game magazine ad, because I didn’t simply see the game in the store and go, “DAD I WANT THIS,” like I did with Morrowind (the best decision pre-teen me ever made, lbr), but was actively excited for it to be released.
I know that’s supposed to be a halo but it really just looks like dust and moths. Also behold Lady Evil Boobs- I mean Lady Grey.
I got it on or near its release date, despite the M rating, and promptly stayed up until approximately 5AM the next morning so that I could beat it all in one sitting, because at that point in my life I only had real access to my Xbox every other weekend (and somehow also the capacity to stay up all night which I lost after I turned 20). And then did the same exact thing when my disc died and I got a copy of The Lost Chapters to replace it.
And then did the same thing again except more obsessively when I got my hands on the Anniversary edition.
All of my playthroughs of Fable have been ridiculously fun, including the one where, after I beat the game, I went from having a middling alignment to being flat out evil and having horns, to having that weird halo thing with the butterflies that look like moths, and running around in my Union Flag underwear punching people.
The surprise of the main story which thoroughly shocked teenage me but would have been slightly less so had I played it as an adult, obviously doesn’t exist anymore, but it’s still fun to go through the game and meet A Certain Person with this reaction each time I see their stupid villain face:
I still think the first Fable is the best of all the games in the series, although I do remember being super excited about being able to be a girl in Fable 2 and equally so in Fable 3 (and also about Nick Hoult voicing your friend/romance interest/the only marriageable NPC in the game with any real personality although I still vastly prefer Elise). But that will never stop me from loving my incredibly tall, incredibly buff, plate armour covered mute Hero.
Although I could really do without those reminders whenever my Health or Will is low. I KNOW ITS LOW I SEE THE BARS I JUST GOT SKEWERED BY A BANDIT COULD YOU F-
5/5, would “stand there like a lemon” again.